Shetland, Day One

Arrived on What'ssay at 12.00 with the top crew - Big Dick, Pipit Shagger and Captain Wank. We immediately scored with a selfie that got 14 likes - top posting! Within an hour we had found our digs and had a top result with 25 Twitter messages of congratulations! Top liking all round. After checking our feeds we got changed into combat gear and staked out a phone box, where in 1982 Dick Trilby famously took the call that resulted in a major Little Egret twitch. No incoming calls to grill today, but our crew selfie taken in the phone box resulted in 12 likes - top posting!! It was turning into a rare day!!!

Mid afternoon saw a birder yelling at us that he had a PG Tips. Seeing that Captain Wank had just made us all a brew we ignored him, especially as the yelling birder was in an iris bed at the time. Never heard of a cafe in such a place. Moron... undetered we took a selfie, top gurning from the crew, but we only got two likes. Poor. It started to smell 'rare', but that could have just been Big Dick's socks.

We started to flag by late afternoon. We had been on our phones all afternoon and had liked over thirty posts - thirsty work! Pipit Shagger thought that he might have seen a back of camera shot of one of our selfies, and Big Dick tweeted that he had self-found a stone wall that looked promising. Tomorrow we might even get our binoculars and telescopes out!!!

Last year the crew scored with 67 likes, 34 retweets and 17 comments. Can we better it this year? What we really hope though is that the Scillies are really shit this week...

Comments

Dylan Wrathall said…
So very sad - where is the enjoyment of looking at nature headed?? This is so close to the mark to be excruciatingly painful for an old man - Dyl
30 September 2017 at 20:29
Skev said…
Top posting! I'll be sure to check your Insta and follow your week on SnatchFlash .....
30 September 2017 at 20:36
GeoffB said…
Boom ! one of your best Steve ..havent laughed so much since I read Evans list for 2005
1 October 2017 at 11:01
Stewart said…
'Skawed' my second PG Tips of the Autumn, hahaha, shite padders now, now where is that Dicks, I still need it....
1 October 2017 at 20:11
mike N. said…
Who said satire was dead?
8 October 2017 at 23:02
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